Contents
Contents
Introduction
Exercise 1
Exercise 2
The Vicious Cycle Of Stress
How Negative Thoughts Can Snowball
Exercise 3
How Does Stress Affect Your Thinking
Exercise 4
Unhelpful Thoughts
Exercise 5
Common Unhelpful Ways of Thinking
Exercise 6
Exercise 7
Positive Thinking
Breaking The Habit
Tackling Unhelpful Thoughts
Exercise 8
Summary Quiz
Useful Contacts
Thought Patterns And Stress
The aim of these Wellbeing Workbooks is to help you learn more about stress and the things you can do to help reduce your stress when you feel very worried or anxious.
What to Expect
- There are four workbooks altogether and they should each take around 2 hours to complete
- The workbooks should supplement the information you are learning about mental health in your school classes
- Each workbook has information, exercises and games to help you learn about wellbeing
- The exercises in the workbooks are simply there to aid your learning. You do not have to share any of your answers to the exercises; you can keep them as private as you would like to
- If you are feeling really stressed and think you would like to talk to someone about this, there are phone numbers and websites available in the Useful Contacts section
In Session 2 We Looked At:
-
How stress affects our behavior
- Avoidance
- Under-activity
- Over-activity
- How stress can affect our thought process
- How to work on avoidance and under-activity
- Things to help when you do too much
In Session 3 We Will Look At:
- How stress affects our thinking
- How to identify unhelpful thoughts and negative styles of thinking
- How our thinking affects our feelings
- How to challenge unhelpful thoughts
Exercise 1: How is life just now?
Using the scale below, where would you rate your quality of life this week?
Now think about what has been happening in your life recently to make you feel this way. Think about the good things and the bad.
You can write your thoughts in the notepad below.
How is life just now?
Exercise 2: What makes a good life?
Using the scale below, mark where you think you would need to score in order to feel you have a ‘good life’
How would you know that you had reached a ‘good quality of life’? What would you be doing differently compared to now, if anything?
You can write your thoughts in the notepad below.
What makes a good life?
The Vicious Cycle of Stress
Let's revisit the Cycle of Stress that we’ve seen over the last couple of weeks. This time let’s think about the thoughts section of the cycle
Our feelings are determined by our thoughts, so the way we think will have a big impact on how we feel
How Negative Thoughts Can Snowball
Here is an example of how each worrying thought feeds into the next. As our thoughts become more and more extreme our level of stress increases.
- Typical – It wasn’t raining till I got here!
- The bus is ALWAYS late
- I’ll be late for work
- They will all be talking about me when I get in
- The boss won’t be happy
- I’ll get into trouble
- I’ll get pulled into the office
- I’ll get fired!
Recognising what we say to ourselves and changing it to more positive self-talk can be very powerful and significantly improve how we feel.
Exercise 3
Now you try: think of a situation you have been in where your thoughts have snowballed, and write down the sequence of thoughts that you had.
- 1. ...
- 2. ...
- 3. ...
- 4. ...
- 5. ...
How Does Stress Affect Your Thinking?
Here are some examples of the common thoughts people have when they feel under stress. Unfortunately, these same thoughts INCREASE how stressed we feel:
- I can't cope
- I'm useless
- They will all think I'm stupid
- What's the point in trying
- Things never go right for me
- There must be something wrong with me
- I just want to get out of here
- They are all looking at me
- They all know I can't cope
What unhelpful things do you say to yourself when you are stressed?
Exercise 4
Have a think about the last time you felt worried, stressed or low.
SITUATION – where were you, who were you with, what were you doing?
THOUGHTS - what were you saying to yourself at the time?
How did these thoughts make you feel?
How helpful were these thoughts?
Unhelpful Thoughts
Unhelpful thoughts are:
- Automatic
- Seem to come from nowhere – but are actually based on our beliefs
- Seem reasonable, so we tend not to question them
Unhelpful thoughts can:
- Happen when our emotions change e.g. when we get stressed
- Create more stress
- Become a habit and get much worse if they aren’t tackled
These thoughts can take many different forms:
1. Words and sentences:
- I will collapse if I have to wait in a big queue at the shop
- No-one will talk to me if I go into the staff room
- I can’t do this job anymore, it’s too much for me and everyone knows that I can’t cope
2. Images:
- Seeing yourself lying on the shop floor, ambulance outside
- Seeing yourself making a fool of yourself or imagining everyone talking about you when you leave
3. Memories:
- Seeing someone else who had collapsed in a shop in the past
- Remembering the last time you felt low or the last time you didn’t do so well at work or did something wrong
Types of Unhelpful Self-Talk
Exercise 5
Look back at your answers for Exercise 4. In any of your thoughts, do you notice:
"What if ..." thoughts?
Yes
No
"I can't cope with ..." thoughts?
Yes
No
"What is the point ..." thoughts?
Yes
No
"How do I get out of ..." thoughts?
Yes
No
Common Unhelpful Ways of Thinking
Taking on responsibility
I take on responsibility, particularly for things going wrong even when a situation has nothing to do with me.
Mind reading
I tend to assume other people don't like me / think badly of me
Jumping to conclusions
I tend to assume that the worst will happen
Over personalising
I focus on / blow small things out of proportion
Looking On The Negative Side
I tend to focus on the black side of things
Being Too Hard On Yourself
Overlooking my strengths and focusing on my weak points
Gloomy View of The Future
I overestimate the chances of bad things happening
Making extreme statements / rules
I often say I "must", "should", or "have to". I want things to be just right / perfect
Exercise 6: Complete The Word Search Puzzle
Draw with your mouse to connect the letters and complete the puzzle.
Exercise 7
Look again at the thoughts you wrote down earlier.
Use the following pages to help you identify some of your unhelpful ways of thinking about yourself, others and the future
Being hard on yourself
Yes
No
Looking on the negative side
Yes
No
Gloomy view of the future
Yes
No
Jumping to conclusions
Yes
No
Mind reading
Yes
No
Taking on responsibility unnecessarily
Yes
No
Over personalising
Yes
No
Making extreme statements / rules
Yes
No
Positive Thinking
You can learn to think more positively in the same way that you learned to think negatively but you have to practice.
Here are some positive statements to practice saying to yourself daily:
Memory Points
- The way we think affects the way we feel and act
- Stress is associated with certain unhelpful ways of thinking
- These ways of thinking become a habit
Breaking The Habit
It should be easy? To stop the unhelpful thoughts we should simply stop thinking them...but unfortunately, it’s not always that easy.
Pink Elephants:
- 1 In your mind, picture a pink elephant.
- 2 Now, stop thinking about the pink elephant.
- 3 Are you still thinking about it?
So the question is, what CAN we do to tackle unhelpful thinking?
Tackle Unhelpful Thoughts
Here are some questions you can ask yourself that may help in tackling unhelpful thoughts:
- Firstly, do not judge yourself for having negative types of thinking.
- Secondly, ask yourself, what is the evidence to support this thought? Is the thought actually true?
- What alternative views are there? What would other people say?
- Does this thought help me? Does this way of thinking hold me back? How?
- What unhelpful thinking styles have I noticed (see p10)? What was the result of those unhelpful thoughts?
- What can I do to change the situation?
Example Scenario:
What typical thoughts would you think if someone you knew walked past you on the street without acknowledging you or saying hello? Might they be something like this...
- I must have done something to upset them and they're ignoring me
- They don't like me and don't want to talk to me
- How dare they walk by me like that
The following examples show how you can take an unhelpful thought and change it to a more positive thought.
"I’ll look like an idiot. People will be looking at me"
Alternative Positive Coping Thought:
- People have their own lives to think about, why would they look at me?
- There are plenty of people not looking at me
- Even if they do look, why does it matter? What makes me think their opinions are so valuable?
- The last time I had to do this it turned out to be completely fine
Can you think of another positive coping thought to balance the unhelpful thought "I’ll look like an idiot"?
"My heart is beating so fast I am going to have a heart attack"
Alternative Positive Coping Thought:
- This has happened before and I’ve been OK
- This is just my body’s reaction to fear
- I can manage this
- I cannot die from a panic attack
Can you think of a different positive coping thought? You can write it in the box below:
"I am useless"
Alternative Positive Coping Thought:
- I might not feel good about myself right now but I have done things that are worthwhile
- Everyone has bad days
- That didn’t go as well as I had hoped but that doesn’t mean I am useless
Can you think of a different positive coping thought? You can write it in the box below:
Exercise 8
In this exercise, think back to some of your unhelpful thoughts and then try to come up with a more balanced alternative thought
| Unhelpful Thought | Balanced Point Of View |
|---|---|
Memory Points
- Notice the unhelpful thoughts you are saying to yourself
- Challenge these thoughts and come up with more balanced alternatives
And Finally
Over the next week, notice what goes through your mind when you feel stressed or low.
Try to tackle any unhelpful thoughts by using the techniques from the exercises you have done in this workbook.
If you identify any unhelpful thinking, try to ask yourself:
Notice if you feel differently once you have asked yourself these questions and have challenged your way of thinking
Summary Quiz
Q1: Which of the following diagrams represents the vicious cycle of stress?
- a. Feelings → Worrying Thoughts → Behavioural Changes → Stressful Situation → Bodily symptoms
- b. Worrying Thoughts → Feelings → Bodily Symptoms → Stressful Situation → Behavioural Changes
- c. Stressful Situation → Worrying Thoughts → Bodily symptoms → Feelings → Behavioural Changes
Q2: Our feelings are primarily determined by our _____
- a. Intelligence
- b. Personality
- c. Thoughts
Q3: What do we mean when we say "negative thoughts can snowball"?
- a. When one negative thought takes over your mind.
- b. When one negative thought leads to another negative thought and so on, with each thought becoming more and more serious.
- c. When you have several negative thoughts about different things in your mind at once.
Q4: Unhelpful thoughts are _________ and ______
- a. Voluntary and based on beliefs
- b. Automatic and come from nowhere
- c. Automatic and based on beliefs
- d. Voluntary and come from nowhere
Q5: Common unhelpful ways of thinking include...
- a. Taking on responsibility, mind reading, jumping to conclusions
- b. Under personalizing, mind reading, making extreme statements
- c. Having a gloomy view of the future, not taking on responsibility, jumping to conclusions
Q6: Ways to tackle unhelpful thoughts include...
- a. Not judging yourself for having the thought, ignoring evidence which suggests the thought may not be true, questioning how helpful the thought is
- b. Judging yourself for thinking so negatively, questioning if there is any evidence to support the thought, questioning how helpful the thought is
- c. Not judging yourself for having the thought, questioning if there is any evidence to support the thought, questioning how helpful the thought is
Useful Contacts
- Childline
- Phone: 0800 1111 (free 24 hour)
- childline.org.uk
- Mental Health Foundation
- Information and support for anyone with mental health problems or learning disabilities
- www.mentalhealth.org.uk
- Mind
- Promotes views and needs of people with mental health problems
- Phone: 0300 123 3393 (Mon-Fri, 9am-6pm)
- www.mind.org.uk
- NHS
- NHS 24: phone 111
- nhs.uk
- PAPYRUS
- Young suicide prevention
- Phone: 0800 068 4141 (Mon-Fri,10am-5pm & 7-10pm. Weekends 2-5pm)
- www.papyrus-uk.org
- Rethink Mental Illness
- Support and advice for people living with mental illness
- Phone: 0800 5000 927 (Mon-Fri, 9.30am-4pm)
- www.rethink.org
- SafeSpot
- An app and website designed for young people to improve coping skills and access information about mental health
- www.safespot.org.uk
- App: available on Google play/Apple store for free
- Samaritans
- Confidential support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair
- Phone: 116 123 (free, 24hour)
- samaritans.org.uk